Yesterday, I posted a story about a co-worker who was telling a story about her husband saying that he didn't like the dress she chose to get to a wedding, and went out, unasked, and bought a new dress for her to wear, then pressured her into wearing it. A male co-worker remarked that "ALL women like it when their man buys them a new dress" and I told him that was a liiiiitle sexist. He then asked if I was a feminist (not in a particularly nice way, either). And, despite an initial cringe at the accusation, I said that yes, I was a feminist.
The discussion that ensued amongst my Facebook friends really focused on the dress story. Was he right? Was she over-reacting? Was he being controlling? By the point of my post was not really that story, but of identifying, for the first time in my life, as feminist.
In the past few years, I've made a lot of new friends through the burlesque and cosplay communities. And among those new friends are a several outspoken feminists. The kind that often post articles and videos addressing feminism.
As for myself, I have been mostly silent on the subject. Although I'd never admit it, I never identified as a feminist because of the social stigma - society said that feminists are man-haters, shit-disturbers, and more interested in whining about their problems and quoting statistics than actually doing something. I have always believed in equality between the sexes, but I was bred to believe that feminism was not the way to get there. I mean,look at what happened, just now, when I looked up "Why feminism..." on Google:
But after months of being bombarded with feminist thinking in my newsfeed, something clicked. I recognized it in my own life. I saw it happening in front of me (even if it was just a small offhanded comment) - not just that, but I recognized it, and addressed it, even I had to push through my own social training to do it (Seriously, I mentally flinched when he asked if I was a feminist).
But here's the thing: I would not have noticed that slightly sexist comment if I hadn't learned how sexism works and how it manifests itself. And who taught me? Feminism. All those videos and articles and comments that my feminist friends have been throwing all over my newsfeed, and even the big corporations who have started a trend in mainstream media that addresses things like feminism and homophobia and bullying. They may be doing it for the attention and customers, but it's still a good message.
It took a good long while, but the message eventually sank in. And now, I'm not ashamed to say that I'm a feminist. And feminism is so so so important. And I sincerely thank all my feminist friends who have, and continue to, educate the masses.
I want to be a part of the solution, not the problem. Sexism (along with homophobia, bullying, shaming, etc) has NO place in the enlightened mind and enlightened society.
Leah Out. *drops mic*
